When people think of Africa they think of many different things. Most people have a National Geographic view of Africa, that people live in huts and wear loin cloths and carry around spears to fend off the wild animals all around. To be fair, if that is all you know or all you see, then that is what Africa is to you. People do still live in huts here, just not everyone, and the other things you never see in Togo.
So much of Africa is developed to a point, some countries more than others. Togo is one of the countries that is less developed than most others. One huge problem in Togo is sickness and a lack of good health care. Just a year ago a wonderful American mission hospital opened up about two hours north of us, and we are so happy and excited that we have something so close. Prior to that, we would have needed to travel seven hours south to get to a good hospital.
Togo has many different sicknesses just like most places in Africa. To be honest, it is scary to think of how many different kinds of illnesses there are, and dangerous ones at that. I just heard today that another person died of meningitis. Life is very fragile here, more so than in the States it seems.
Just recently Jesse became ill with malaria. Normally you start treatment and it starts to go away after the first dose, or at least that has been our experience. But not this time; after the second dose Jesse's temperature continued to climb and would not come down. He was so uncomfortable and miserable. His temp was 104 before it started decreasing. We were finally able to get it down a few degrees, close to normal. He later on told me that it was the worst fever he has ever had, and he just wanted to die because he was so uncomfortable. After the third dose of medicine he really started taking a turn for the better, and he started walking around by himself. Before this, he had to put his arms over my shoulders and walk that way for fear of him passing out or falling. The next day, he was much better and we were praising God for his healing. It was such a scary time and a time of complete trust in the wisdom of God on how to deal with the situation.
Just recently, in the hospital two hours north of us, a doctor became ill with malaria and was not getting better. He also had another infection that they could not pinpoint. It got so bad that he was flown to Germany to get help, but our Heavenly Father decided to take him home. It was such a scary time for everyone. We were on our knees begging God to spare his life, to heal the sickness that was attacking his body. But in the end God took him home and we wonder why, but our faith is in the One who controls the universe, who is sovereign, and know this doctor by name and cares for him deeply. He is His child.
This happened shortly after Jesse got sick, and it made me start thinking of my life and my family. We are not promised tomorrow; our life is just a vapor and then it is gone. I started asking myself questions like: Who am I living my life for? My family or my Lord? Am I willing to let my husband go completely? Am I holding on too tightly to him? Am I holding on too tightly to my children? Have I taken up the cross and truly abandoned my life for Jesus? Yes I live in Africa, yes I have given up things to be here, but have I truly given my life, poured it out for Him? What is the most important thing in my life? Is it stuff, family, entertainment? What do I live for?
All of these questions are continuing to go through my mind as I am in Togo, hearing about people dying, and children coming down with rare diseases. How closely do I hold onto my life? Now I am not saying I don't use the brain God gave me to be cautious, but do I live in fear over these things to the point that they will hold me captive and not allow me live out my life for Him in Togo?
I am not a perfect Christian or a perfect missionary, I have never claimed to be. I wish I could tell you I answered everyone of those questions with a great answer, but it is just not so. So please pray for me and my family, that we would not hold tightly to the things of this world, but keep our eyes on Him.
